Tuesday, June 24, 2014

An Analysis of Good Housekeeping's* Proven Diet Secrets

*Or a similar magazine. Don't remember, crushing disappointment has made me block out the details.

I was standing in line behind a really slow customer at the grocery store last night, and picked up the Good Housekeeping (or something like that) off the rack which promised something like Proven Weight Loss Secrets or maybe Weight Loss Secrets that Really Work. 

Seeing as my most comfortable mom jeans have suddenly become my tightest skinny jeans, I figured I'd read it for free while standing in line.  I mean why commit to buying the magazine if I don't know if it's good, right?  It's not like I ever buy magazines about house keeping.  I mean a house keeper cleans. I don't want to read about cleaning. 

GH (or whoever they were) gets some serious credit for having a easily locatable table of contents that referenced the teasers on the cover.  When one is stealthily reading magazines in the grocery line there is nothing worse than having to turn through 5 pages of ads to find the dang table of contents. 

I located the page and started skimming as quickly as I could.

 Diet blah blah blah Exercise blah blah blah.

This is there secret to losing weight? Diet and exercise?  I knew that! Everyone knows that!  This is not revolutionary!  That is no fun and hard work and not at all what I was looking for!

There were two secrets I didn't know:  drink more water and get more sleep.  I like to take naps.  I am taking the author's advice and starting the day with a glass of water while my coffee brews.  I'll let you know if it turns out to be a dieting miracle, but I don't have my hopes up. 

(I planned on linking to their article but I can't find it online. Perhaps it wasn't even Good Housekeeping that I read, but one of its clones. I did find this article on how to lose ten pounds and spoiler: it says to eat 1300 calories a day.)

1 comment:

  1. I love your writing and your blog. I found you from your "...F**k Me Shoes..." article. I'm a single mother with two (now grown) kids and I can relate. I'll be following your blog. Best Regards,


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