Facebook sucks a lot of funny stories out of me by turning them into six or ten word memoirs. A six-word memoir is a story told in 6 words. The most famous example was done by Hemingway:
"For sale. Baby shoes. Never worn."
I have a whole book of 6 word memoirs on the topic of love and heartbreak. It was given to me by a guy I had my first date with after I separated from my husband. I went to the mailbox my first Valentine's Day after the divorce and there it was. It totally made my day, which was only slightly lessened by learning through Facebook that he gave the same book to at least one other woman. I don't care, I will always be grateful for that small act of kindness in sending it to me on a day I needed a gift from a single guy very badly. I still think he's tops, though I have never seen him again. (We live in different states.) And I still paw through that book on occasion.
Facebook statuses are like that -- we take the most pertinent part of a story and post it then no longer have the burning desire to write the story. In an effort to not kill off my potential blog material, I took a Facebook hiatus yesterday. Not that I wasn't on Facebook constantly, but I tried to hold back my own status updates. You can thank me later.
Things said at my house Saturday:
"Mama, I've been waiting to meet a paleontologist since I was in your tummy."
"Do not wipe your snot on Mama's sweater!"
"Hold the blanket down! Your brother farted!"
And the best of all:
"If you didn't get enough toilet paper, and now it is stuck with poo to your finger, DO NOT use the wall to scrape it off!"